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Friday, 18 November 2016

Are You Fucking Kidding Me (UPDATED)


I feel like I should stay away from most people when I'm in one of my moods. Or I'll just end up snapping at everybody and end up unleashing all my repressed rage and frustration that I've been hiding with regards to that particular person onto them. Even if they're not the source of my bad mood. Which will probably scare them, and make me look like a psycho.

In general I do my best to avoid showing actual anger at anybody, in the rare occasion that I actually do get mad. But from my limited experiences, I have classified them into levels:

Level 1: mild subtweeting and small rants to friends who roll their eyes and question why they put up with me.
Level 2: explicit tweeting and long angry internal rants
Level 3: actual discernibly different behaviour towards subject of anger. Noticeably colder and more distant. While angrily crying on the phone and venting towards Fairy, who puts up with my shit, amazingly enough.
Level 4: Passive aggressive behaviour directed at subject. Noticeable rise in snarky rude comments.
Level 5: Snarky rude comments continues to increase. It is at this point that subject should confront and attempt to resolve the situation. If ignored
Level 6: Actual confrontation where I speak angrily but at a normal volume. If no compromise is reached
Level 7: I speak angrily at a louder volume and actually tell the subject to shut the fuck up if subject attempts to interrupt or badly attempt a rebuttal. No snide comments at this point, just pure insults and swearing. Past this point, relationship/friendship/whatever is probably gonna end badly, or take months or years to fix up.
Level 8: I storm off, cut them off completely from my life. Will engage in psycho behaviour if subject attempts to pursue the matter. Better off waiting for me to cool down. Might take weeks or months.

Even for my very bad spat with Fairy this year, that was about a 5. The last time I got mad at Zucchini cuz I was convinced he has been lying to me about how he was over his ex and not gonna pursue her, that was about a 3.1, which would have escalated at most to a 3.5. Or 4. Depending on the circumstances.
Most situations don't make it past a 3 or 4. 8 probably only happened once or twice in my life.

Also my essay isn't as bad as I thought it was, I'm just unnecessarily harsh, apparently.

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